
Posted originally on the Archive_of_Our_Own at https://archiveofourown.org/
works/8803477.
  Rating:
      Explicit
  Archive Warning:
      Rape/Non-Con, Underage
  Category:
      Multi
  Fandom:
      Drunks_roleplay
  Relationship:
      random_peeple
  Character:
      Drunk_-_Character, Ivan, Harry_Warden, Possibly_More_-_Character
  Additional Tags:
      wtf_is_this
  Stats:
      Published: 2016-12-10 Updated: 2016-12-21 Chapters: 3/? Words: 1966
****** Weird shitt happening on steam mount and blade rp's ******
by Lannister4Life
Summary
     You should not read this if you value your mental health.
Notes
     WARNING DO NOT READ IF UNDER 30!
See the end of the work for more notes
***** Why is this real *****
Drunk Robbie Rotten: Can I cut off your dick
Drunk Robbie Rotten: And stick a bean in it
King Ivan: maybe
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Removes your pubic hairs one by one*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Makes a mustace for you from your pubic hairs*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: There
King Ivan: danks
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Pulls out your eyes*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Makes a hole in your scrotum*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Drains fluid*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Removes testicles*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Replaces your eyeballs in your scrotum, and your
testicles in your eye sockets*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: There
King Ivan: thanks dad
King Ivan: plz
King Ivan: i want ur ass noa
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Shoves your head in my ass*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Sucks in your head further with my ass*
King Ivan: wow dad
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *takes a shit*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *my shit goes into your mouth*
King Ivan: *sucks shit down throat*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *sucks your head into my large intestine*
King Ivan: *shoves legs down ur throat*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *breaks your legs*
King Ivan: Prys open ur nose, and shves dick all the way up your ass and out
your mouth*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *my stomach acid desolves the middle of your dick*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *I bite off the tip of your dick*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Your dick is severed in two*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *swallows one half of it*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Sucks in the other*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: Both enter my stomach*
King Ivan: *cuts off ball sack, and shoves down harrys wardens throat*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Grabs you*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Shits you out*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Ties you to a building*
Drunk Robbie Rotten: *Shoves a steel rod up your asshole*
King Ivan: *jumps out of ass and flys out window into space*
King Ivan: The end
***** Nipple time *****
Chapter Summary
     ;-; By common request
Chapter Notes
See the end of the chapter for notes
One day harold harnipples met harold softnipples.
Harold sucked softnipples extremely soft nipples, and slapped his ass with a
mustard jar.
Softnipple cummed out of his nipples, and hardnipples swalloed it all
They then started sucking eachothers ballsacks, and chewing the hair off it.
They made the hair into mustachios, and put them on each other
Drunk burst through the window, and started hitting them both with a giant
dildo
In unision, both nipples grabbed the dildo, and shoved it down drunks ass.
Then everyone orgasimed and lived happily ever after getting high.
THE END
Chapter End Notes
     xD
***** dank meme school roleplay *****
Chapter Summary
     why is this real?
Drunk Repressed Farmer: yo
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Is dat kewl gum dealer at scool*
Ivan the Turtle: wat
Ivan the Turtle: u have em 2
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Who is so cool he got 3 detentions in a day*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: Yo
Drunk Repressed Farmer: How much gum ya want
Ivan the Turtle: 5 nigerian blaots plz
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Throws up five double bubbles*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Catches them*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Does an elaborate cool-ass dance with them, then
throws them like a basketball individually into your hand*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: Yo! Here!
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Spits gum onto the floor*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Chews another 15 double bubbles*
Ivan the Turtle: yo yo yo *Wraps sweater around waist*
Ivan the Turtle: *wraps another round neck*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: Yo
Drunk Repressed Farmer: Mah dawg
Ivan the Turtle: *Puts on sexy blue jacket with 5 letters on it for no reason*
Ivan the Turtle: YO YO YO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO YO YO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: UP TOPS BROTHA!
Ivan the Turtle: *Highfives*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *The Teacher comes in*
Ivan the Turtle: NOW LETS GO HAVE SOME (family friendly) FUN YO!
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Gives us both lunch detentions*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO!
Drunk Repressed Farmer: SHIT DAWG!
Ivan the Turtle: NOT COOL BRUH!
Drunk Repressed Farmer: I GOTTA FOURTH DETENTION TODAY!
Drunk Repressed Farmer: NOT COOL!
Ivan the Turtle: i mean, yooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO YO YO YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Dabs*
Ivan the Turtle: *RKO's someone*
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO DID YOU JUST ASSUME MY GENDER?
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO BROTHA, THAT VINE FUNNY!
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle: DAMN DANIEL
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO YO YO YOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Takes the principal's water bottle*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Does a flip with it*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Dabs*
Drunk Repressed Farmer:
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle:
Yoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: // Just a minute
Drunk Repressed Farmer: // Geting Pugler to be principal
Your chat with Drunk Repressed Farmer is now a multi-user chat.
Big Smoke entered chat.
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: *is Principal Phuck*
Ivan the Turtle: MY NIGERIAN BRUDA
Big Smoke: NO FUCKING YELLING IN THE HALLWAY
Drunk Repressed Farmer: YO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: Come on dawg!
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WASSUPMYDAWG
Drunk Repressed Farmer: I just did a water bottle flip with your water bottle
Ivan the Turtle: NOT KOOL MR PRINCIPAL MAN
Big Smoke: FUK BROOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Spits gum on the principal*
Ivan the Turtle: *flips 5 waterbottles at some time*
Big Smoke: WE GON SMOKE THAT BITCH
Ivan the Turtle: *All land on cap*
Big Smoke: WHAT THE FUCK
Big Smoke: YOU
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: ARE
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Gets another glob of gum*
Big Smoke: WHAT THE
Ivan the Turtle: AWESOME?
Big Smoke: STOP
Ivan the Turtle: I KNOW
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Chews*
Big Smoke: YOU'RE FIRED
Drunk Repressed Farmer: EVERYTHING IS AWESOME!
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP
Drunk Repressed Farmer: I'M YOUR STUDENT DAWG.
Drunk Repressed Farmer: IN DA JUNIOR HIGH
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Spits gum on the principal*
Big Smoke: DETENTIN
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Holds hand infront of the principal's face*
Big Smoke: DETENTION
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Slaps his neck*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: NEHH!
Big Smoke: *takes out gun*
Big Smoke: *points at his studen*
Big Smoke: NIGGER
Drunk Repressed Farmer: I'M WHITE BOI
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Blows a massive bubble gum bubble*
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP CRACKER
Big Smoke: *shoots bubble*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: WOAH!
Big Smoke: BITCH
Drunk Repressed Farmer: MY BROTHA DOES THAT WITH A BEE BEE GUN!
Big Smoke: DETENTION
Big Smoke: FUCKING
Big Smoke: DETENTION
Big Smoke: DE
Big Smoke: TEN
Big Smoke: TION
Big Smoke: DO I NEED TO SPELL IT OUT?
Ivan the Turtle:
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: DE T E N T E O N
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: DETENTION
Big Smoke: CUNT
Ivan the Turtle: PRINCIPLEMAN
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP
Ivan the Turtle: NO KO0L
Big Smoke: YOURE IN DETENTION TOO
Ivan the Turtle:
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle: TAHTS NOT KOOL
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP
Drunk Repressed Farmer:
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: I'M CALLING YOUR MOM
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer:
GARGHHHHHHHHHHHJAHGJDHGHAJGHJDHGAJAHJDHGJDHGDJGHDJGHDGJDHGJDHGHDHGDJHGDJGHDJGHDJGJDGHDJGHDJGDHJGHDJGDGJDHGHDJGDJGHDJGDJHGDHJGHDJGDHGDHJGJDGDJHGDHGDHJGD
Ivan the Turtle: DONT DO IT YO
Ivan the Turtle: PLZ
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle: PLZ
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Screams like a retard thinking I am a class clown*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: KALFLASKFLALFKDKAFLKFLDAFKKLAFDE
Drunk Repressed Farmer: HURHURHURHURHURDURDURDURDURDURDURDURDUR
Big Smoke: STOP
Big Smoke: CUNT
Big Smoke: *calls retard police*
Ivan the Turtle: ALLAH AKBAR YO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: STOP CUNT
Big Smoke: BITCH
Ivan the Turtle: IM A TROUBLED TEEN
Big Smoke: UNDER ARREST
Drunk Repressed Farmer: BLAHBLAHBLAHBLAHBLAH
Big Smoke: UNDER TENTENTION
Drunk Repressed Farmer: BLAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Ivan the Turtle: *Reaches into locker*
Big Smoke: NIGGERS! *shoots at ivan*
Ivan the Turtle: *Pulls out machine gun*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Pulls out gun at the principal*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Squirts*
Ivan the Turtle: *Fires at principal* YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: WATER GUN YOOO!
Ivan the Turtle: YO
Big Smoke: *keeps shooting at ivan and drunk*
Ivan the Turtle: OYOY
Ivan the Turtle: OY
Drunk Repressed Farmer: LOOSEN UP!
Ivan the Turtle: YY
Ivan the Turtle: YOY
Ivan the Turtle: YOY
Ivan the Turtle: YOY
Ivan the Turtle: YO
Ivan the Turtle: YO
Ivan the Turtle: YOYOYO
Ivan the Turtle: YOOY
Big Smoke: FUCK YYEEWW
Big Smoke: MURICA
Ivan the Turtle:
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *The guns from ivan and i are water guns*
Big Smoke: FOKIN REDNEK
Big Smoke: MURICAAA
Ivan the Turtle: *goes yo at every shot
Big Smoke: *mine isnt*
Ivan the Turtle: yo yo yoy oy yoy oyoyoyooyyoy oyo yo yo y
Drunk Repressed Farmer: // You know you are screaming at like 11 year olds
smoke?
Big Smoke: //ye
Ivan the Turtle: DIE NIGERIAN SCUM
Big Smoke: SHUT THE FUCK UP
Big Smoke: YOURE 11
Big Smoke: CUNT
Big Smoke: STOP
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Runs out of principals office*
Big Smoke: SHUT UP
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: WHERE THE FUCK
Drunk Repressed Farmer: GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Big Smoke: *pulls out real gun*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: MAKE ER RUN FOR IT!
Big Smoke: *shoots at drunk*
Big Smoke: BITCH
Big Smoke: STOP
Big Smoke: YOU POTATO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *you miss*
Ivan the Turtle: I DID IY BECAUSE IM EDGY AS FUCK
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Runs to my locker*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *I am almost as school exit*
Big Smoke: *one last bullet hits his shoe*
Big Smoke: BITCH
Drunk Repressed Farmer: bu
Drunk Repressed Farmer: bu
Drunk Repressed Farmer: MAH SHOE
Drunk Repressed Farmer:
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Big Smoke: NIGGA
Drunk Repressed Farmer:
WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Cries*
Big Smoke: YOUR TIM'S ARE MINE
Ivan the Turtle: *takes out knife*
Ivan the Turtle: Stabs principal in balls*
Big Smoke: *pulls him by the hair*
Big Smoke: FUCK
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOO
Big Smoke: OH MY GOD
Ivan the Turtle: DIE IN HELL
Big Smoke: *big smoke moan*
Ivan the Turtle: IM EDGY AF
Big Smoke: AAAAAAAAAAAAH
Big Smoke: *takes his gun and shoots ivan in the gut*
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Ivan the Turtle: ALLAHU ACKBAR
Ivan the Turtle: *Pulls open abc vest*
Big Smoke: WHAT THE FUCK
Big Smoke: FUCK
Ivan the Turtle: *Grenade coat*
Big Smoke: *runs away*
Big Smoke: *pulls drunk away with him*
Ivan the Turtle: YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: FUCK
Ivan the Turtle: I DIE FOR ISIS
Big Smoke: *gets out of the school*
Ivan the Turtle: LIKE THE EDGY PRETEEN I AM
Ivan the Turtle: 8is repressed homosexual*
Big Smoke: HEY
Big Smoke: STOP
Ivan the Turtle: *starts slappin ass in detention*
Big Smoke: I KNOW YOURE GAY
Big Smoke: PLEASE
Big Smoke: THE SCHOOL ACCEPTS EVERYONE
Ivan the Turtle: I DIE FOR HOMOSEXUALS EVERYWHERE
Big Smoke: fuck
Ivan the Turtle: Oh ok
Big Smoke: *rushes back in the school*
Ivan the Turtle: thats cool
Big Smoke: oh ye
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Suddenly the police bursts in*
Ivan the Turtle: Puts down gun*
Big Smoke: awesome
Big Smoke: OFFICER
Ivan the Turtle: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Big Smoke: HE STABBED MY FUCKING BALLS
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Is Officer Austin's cousin*
Ivan the Turtle: *Pulls pin*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: PUT YOUR HANDS UP
Drunk Repressed Farmer: PRINCIPAL
Ivan the Turtle: ALLAHU AKBAR
Ivan the Turtle: *Runs at caops*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: STOP ATTACKIN THE ELEVEN YEAR OLD
Ivan the Turtle: *starts pulling all the pins*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YA NIGGA
Big Smoke: HE STABBED MY BALLS
Drunk Repressed Farmer: NO HE DIDNT
Big Smoke: HES A TERRORIST
Big Smoke: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Big Smoke: *runs away*
Ivan the Turtle: *Jumnps on principal
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Shoots Big Smoke in the legs*
Ivan the Turtle: *tackles*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Two times*
Big Smoke: NO
Big Smoke: NO
Big Smoke: PLEASE
Big Smoke: IVAN PLEASE
Ivan the Turtle: *Blows up*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: HANDS UP WHERE I CAN SEE THEM
Big Smoke: I LOVE GAYS
Drunk Repressed Farmer: FAT ASS NIGGER FUCK
Big Smoke: *dies*
Big Smoke left chat.
Ivan the Turtle: *slow mo* I LOVE
SNICKERSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Drunk Repressed Farmer: *Shoots the 11 year old*
Drunk Repressed Farmer: FUCKER
End Notes
     Your now officially scared for life and HIV positive congrats.
Please drop_by_the_archive_and_comment to let the author know if you enjoyed
their work!
